Hope
by Flaws
Summary: Happy endings were only for fairy tales. 5986 GokuderaHaru


Uh... I know, it's pretty late for a Christmas story... But Christmas actually lasts for 12 days, right? So I don't think I'm late for a Christmas story. This is actually my first 5986 fic. Pardon me for my grammar errors.

I own nothing.

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Hope

"You're... still in love with him, aren't you?"

She stood there, froze. What should she say right now? What should she do right now? She opened her mouth a little, but words just wouldn't come out. Every word seemed so wrong. She hesitated a little before saying his name, "Gokudera-san..."

"You may be physically here with me, but your mind and heart is still with him, right?" The grey-haired asked bitterly and slowly.

The night is quiet and cold. Haru could hear him clearly even though he's a few metres away from her.

There's short moment of silence before Gokudera continued.

"You're still in love with him, aren't you?" He asked again. "Yamamoto, he's the one who you're still in love, or am I mistaken?" He clenched his fist.

There's another moment of silence.

Gokudera took that as a 'yes'. He clenched his fist tighter. "Don't mess with me!"

Though Gokudera knew that his voice would echoed across the buildings in the middle of the night, but he can't resist from shouting.

"What am I to you?!" His voice started out to be angry, but bitter at the end. "Am I a substitute to you?"

"Gokudera-san..."

"Shut up! Shut the fuck up!"

She gasped.

"Do you know how I felt whenever you call me that?" He asked bitterly as tears started to form at the end of his eyes. "I thought your feelings would change for me, I thought you would return my affection towards you. I thought you would change the way of your doings! But looks like I'm as dumb and naive as ever, huh?"

"Gokudera-san..."

"I always hoped that you would call me by my first name, like how you did to Yamamoto..."

The brunette widen her eyes. He was... hoping for her to call him casually? He had always hoped?

"But looks like we're still nothing but strangers..." Gokudera threw the present that was given by the brunette onto the snowy ground. "WHAT THE FUCK IS THE MEANING OF GIVING A COUPLE RING TO A PERSON WHO YOU'RE NOT IN LOVE WITH?!" He clenched his fist. "We only appeared to be a couple..." A tear dripped onto the white ground. "Let's call this Christmas dinner the last time you'll have pretend to love me." Haru cried after he paused and continued. "... And the last time I'll be a substitute to you..."

A tear fell onto the ground as he coldly turned around. "Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year..."

Haru fell onto her knees. The snow, they're cold. The coldness are biting her skin, her legs felt numb from the coldness.

She felt ashamed. She felt guilty. She felt like she's the worse person ever.

"Takeshi-kun..." She grabbed the snow. "Gokudera-san..." She released her hands and covered her face. "I'm sorry, Gokudera-san... I tried... I tried to love you..."

Everytime Gokudera treats her nicely, she felt guilty. He knew that she's only dating with him for the sake of forgetting her ex long ago, he knew that she wouldn't love him, but he believed that she would one day.

The grey-haired walked home slowly as flashbacks came into his mind.

-----

_"Takeshi-kun always thought about your missions and forgotten about Haru!"_

_"I'm sorry, it can't be helped. Tsuna needs my help and I can't possibly ignore him."_

_"But at least spend a little time with me! Don't tell me..."_

_"What?"_

_"Don't tell me you have another girlfriend other than Haru!"_

_"No! No way!"_

-----

_"You were always talking and thinking about things that got to do with your missions and Mafia! Have you ever thought about me?!"_

_"Wait a minute, Haru."_

_"That's enough! Haru had enough of these nonsense!"_

-----

_"I was wondering if it's a ghost crying, so I'm not wrong after all..." He said coldly._

_"Hahi?" She wiped her tears away. "Haru is not a ghost! I'm a lady! A fine lady!"_

_"Which freakin' part of you makes you a 'fine lady'?!"_

_Haru sprung up from the ground, gritting her teeth and furrowed her eyebrows. Gokudera did the same. But stopped and used his sleeve and roughly wiped her eyes._

_"What are you doing?! You're ruining my eyeliners!"_

_"I'm helping you to look more neater! Your smudged eyeliners made you looked like a ghost!"_

_"Stop calling me that!" She closed her eyes and opened them for several times as Gokudera struggled to wipe her eyes. "And stop using your sleeve as a handkerchief!"_

_"What can I use to help you wipe away those ghost-like makeup?! I don't have gay stuffs like handkerchiefs!" He grabbed her wrists tightly and wiped her tears and eyeliner away._

_Haru stood there, froze. It feels different..._

_By looking into Gokudera's eyes, he looked more gentle and nice than he usually looks... He's wiping her face so gently that made her blush. His grip loosened as he could feel Haru had stopped struggling to free her wrists._

_"There, look much better. Che, you stupid woman, why are you here anyway? Got dumped by Yamamoto or something?" He asked indifferently as he place his hands into his pockets._

_Haru snapped out of her thought and stopped blushing. She lowered her head. Gokudera stared down at her, it's unusual... Normally she would explode and shout at him something about Yamamoto wouldn't do something like that whenever he said that._

_"Oi, what's the matter?"_

_He could hear sobs and sniffs. "O-Oi! Stop crying!" Damn, he's not good with those who cries. "I said stop crying already!"_

_"Takeshi-kun... Takeshi-kun... We... I... All my fault..." She sobbed. Gokudera totally had no idea what she's talking about._

_"Something happened?" He asked concernedly. He removed his black jacket and draped it over Haru's shoulders. He loosen his tie a little and unbuttoned the first button of his red dress shirt and folded his arms. "Che, you're really stupid, wearing so little and came here in the middle of the night."_

_"Yeah... Haru is an idiot, am I?" She chuckled._

_"What happened?"_

_"Takeshi-kun and I broke up."_

_Gokudera blinked. Letting what just came out from Haru's mouth register in his mind._

_"And that's the reason why you came here in the middle of the night, in your pajamas in order to cry so that you won't wake your parents up?_

_Haru nodded._

_"So... Both of you broke up, huh?"_

_"Uh-hm. I broke up with him."_

_"Why? Did that Yakyuu Baka do something wrong?"_

_Since when Gokudera became so concern?_

_"I was so petty... Just because Takeshi-kun always spend most of his time on missions and whenever he's with me, he would talk about his missions and things that got to do with the Mafia..." Haru clenched her fist. "How immature Haru is..."_

_"Yeah, I'm glad that you know that."_

_Haru chuckled, showing her agreement with Gokudera._

_"But..."_

_Haru stopped._

_"You can be a fine lady at times... And I meant only at times!"_

_Haru chuckled. "Really?"_

_"Don't make me repeat my word, stupid woman."_

_Ever since that moment, Gokudera always spend his time with Haru. Comforting her whenever she thought about Yamamoto, letting her wear his coat even if he's cold himself, wiping her tears away with his sleeves and slowly, he grew affection towards her._

_"O-Oi..."_

_"Hahi?"_

_"Don't 'hahi' me, stupid woman!"_

_"Haru is not stupid!"_

_"Ah~ I wonder who told me 'Haru is an idiot, am I?' to me a few weeks ago..." Gokudera mimicked Haru in a sarcastic manner._

_Haru clenched her teeth. Damn her big mouth. But stopped when she remembered Gokudera wanted to tell her something. "What do you want to tell me, by the way?"_

_Is it her, or it's a blush on Gokudera's face? What's so special that made Gokudera blush which he rarely did?_

_"D-D-Datewithme."_

_"Ah?"_

_"Don't 'ah' me! You heard me!"_

_"No I didn't," she said innocently and honestly._

_"Che, datewithme."_

_"Speak louder! I can't hear you!"_

_"Che, DATE WITH ME, damn it!"_

_"Hahi?" Haru let the six words register into her mind. "HAHI?!" She blushed furiously along with Gokudera. "T-T-This is too sudden!"_

_"Then just say you don't want to, stupid woman!" Gokudera turned around, preparing to leave but was stopped by Haru._

_"Haru didn't say she don't want to!"_

_There's a pause, the couple stopped, recalling what did the brunette just said. "Hahi!" Haru covered her mouth._

_Gokudera suddenly pulled her hand and dragged her._

_"What are you doing, Gokudera-san?!"_

_"Che, you're really stupid! Aren't we already dating?! Is it wrong for a boyfriend to bring his girlfriend out?! Che, stupid woman!"_

_Although he's pulling and dragging her, but Gokudera was holding her hand tenderly, so tender that made Haru blushed furiously._

-----

"Yamamoto, are you thinking about Haru?" Tsuna asked slowly. "You seemed to be thinking about her."

"Well, there's nothing I could do other than thinking about her. She seemed to be happy with Gokudera. And I'm sure she don't want to see me."

Tsuna nodded to say that he understands what he meant.

"Gokudera will be able to give her happiness." Yamamoto smiled.

"Yeah, he would."

"It's my fault for making her upset and angry everytime, but I'm sure Gokudera would make her smile everyday."

"After all, loving someone is to let the person you love happy, right?"

Yamamoto replied Tsuna with a smile.

-----

The grey-haired walked into an alley and leaned against the wall. "Looks like everything's over, huh?" He looked up the sky as the snow fell from the sky.

The night goes on as the brunette cried and the grey-haired leaning against the wall, recalling the great and bad times they had.

"Goodbye..." Both of them muttered under their breath at the same time.

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This story is definitely a fail X_x

But I still hope you readers would review this story.


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